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Well, the USA voted and now, we are all left with the aftermath.
Some people have chosen to march or to pray or to write or all of the above. We have been stunned into silence.
We have been enduring waves of grief.
Each person grieves differently and in a different order and that is just fine.
ALL OF YOUR FEELINGS ARE OKAY.
In general, I've noticed social media posts from those who want others to be quiet and stop emoting or move quickly from despair to hope. There is space for both the hope and the despair.
There is space for all of your feelings.
I've spent my non-busy moments with loved ones mostly, quietly trying to come to terms with what we didn't expect, that Hillary would lose and he would win. I've read what others had to say and I've had all sorts of feelings, even hope. And while I will be paddling around in my sea of feelings, I wanted to reach out and let you know that it is a-ok to have all of your feelings too and that there is space for your emotional reactions, whether they come right now this very second or in the weeks or months to come.
I want to honor one's feelings' timeline. As a psychologist, I am interested in how to support my clients as they grieve (or celebrate) in their own ways. I have noticed that big events like this and like Pulse, can make one's own depression seem deeper and can negatively affect one's anxiety as well, and thus, I often encourage people to give themselves extra support during difficult times.
Extra support could look like having another green vegetable or tucking oneself into bed at a decent hour, or hydrating properly. Maybe for others, it means tending to their garden or talking with a loved one or taking the time to meditate.
This is the time for nurturing yourself. You deserve good care and tender loving kindness during rough periods (and, honestly, it is my belief that you always need this care).
If you find that you are struggling to care for yourself, please do reach out for more support.
Here are some numbers to call. Please do head over to your nearest emergency room or call 911 if you are having an emergency.
Trans* Lifeline - a hotline for people of transgender experience, identity, or history experiencing a crisis.
US: (877) 565-8860
Canada: (877) 330-636
Trevor Lifeline - A crisis intervention and suicide prevention phone service for LGBTQ young people and their friends; available 24/7
Access and Crisis Line
(ACL) (San Diego)
(619) 641-6992 TTY
7 days a week/ 24 hours a day
Please see my resources page for more phone numbers.
If you would like some in person support and therapy and you live in the San Diego and Poway, CA areas, please don't hesitate to reach out to me at 619-403-5578 or by email at firstname.lastname@example.org . I would be delighted to talk with you for 15 minutes to see if we are a good fit to work together.
As always my posts do not indication a therapeutic relationship or advice for your specific needs. Please see a professional for individualized support.
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Doctor Abi's Self-Care Ideas' blog post shares ideas and examples for self-care strategies for the LGBT communities and those who love them. This blog post is written by Dr. Abi Weissman, San Diego, California - based LGBT - affirming psychologist.