Supporting Trans Servicemembers

 Supporting Trans Service Members by Dr. Abigail "Abi" Weissman of Waves, A Psychological Corporation 

Supporting Trans Service Members by Dr. Abigail "Abi" Weissman of Waves, A Psychological Corporation 

Oh my goodness, I did not expect 45 to make his horrible announcement today. . . and via tweet, no less. 

I felt like I was doubled over in pain, clutching my stomach. My stomach has been aching from months of his terrible tweets that we have all been witness to since he began his campaign for the US's highest office. In reality, I think I smirked a wry smile and shook my head. I am a therapist after all, and while I was surprised at such cruelty in an already unfair world, my work is in supporting and honoring my client's experience, not my own.

Waves will continue to support trans military, providing services for those covered by TRICARE, as long as services are available. 

Now that work is over for the night, I am aghast. I feel some combination of numb, angry, and worried with a nervous and tight stomach. I'm craving comfort food. I've consulted friends in the legal field and those who know the military well. I've looked to the ACLU and other social justice organizations for their leadership and expertise and sat dumbfounded and in disbelief. Anger rolls through me. It doesn't linger. At once, I want to protest; I want to scream, yell, and cry.. While I am not a fan of war, I am a fan of those who have found themselves and their identities while serving their country. They risk their lives. They get hurt. Some die. They see their friends get hurt and watch some die. Their families care about them. They miss them and worry about them. I worry about them. And tonight, I worry a bit more. 

I live in a military - happy area. I remember moving here, some five years ago and worrying about the conservativism that usually accompanies military - happy areas. It is conservative here, much more so than in the San Francisco Bay Area, and yet, I love living here. I love seeing the support that the transgender communities (yes, that's right, we have more than one community here) have. I love seeing how dependants of the military service people are treated with respect and kindness. I am horrified to think that perhaps these transgender dependents will not get their needs covered any longer. I worry about our trans military, both in the US and outside of it. I am scared for them and, as always, my heart is with them. 

As I turn in for the night, I turn to those I love for support. I realize that they have been waiting for me to leave work so that I can weep next to them. Although I am not in the military, I am, at once a person of trans experience and a psychologist and I weep for us all. 


As always, this blog post does not imply a therapeutic relationship between Waves, A Psychological Corporation, and its readers. Please note too that this post is general advice. Please see a licensed clinician or counselor in your area for resources helpful to you.

If you are in the Poway, California area  and looking for LGBTQIQA - affirming therapy or need consultation or staff training, please feel free to contact me, Dr. Abi Weissman (PSY 27497) HERE or at